I had a dream we were still friends and even in my dream my heart was hurting. I woke up and sobbed. I wish this hurt you as much as it hurts me. I don’t deserve this.
I give myself 1,000 points for getting out of bed, putting on clothes, and going somewhere today. As the day goes on, though, I’m swimming in a world of pain.
I’m exhausted from crying and its only 11 am but the way it’s snowing outside is quite pleasant. To console me, friends are saying, “I love you” but hearing those words is really painful. I don’t know if I’ll ever trust anyone who says that to me from now on.
Nobody tells you about the physical pain.
Tonight was so e eventful! Saw 3 groups of people (1 unintentionally) and no matter if I was laughing it crying I enjoyed myself thoroughly with the people I was with and in felt so good to completely let go and be loud and very drunk and speak neons and let people know where I’m coming from and have real talk
I started drinking at 8 30 so I could be a functional person tomorrow but seeing as I’m still this drunk at nearly 3 am I’m not convinced I won’t be hung over tomorrow. I do not have the perception of time.
(Rest in peace)
are oftentimes so far-fetched, it’s like “let’s see how unrealistic of an application this cracked, mad-scientist brain can come up with, AND think of a way to word it to pass as feasible”
or it’s like, “when the technology progresses, in let’s say… 10, 15 years… we could mayyyybe possibly do this with it!” but for now it’s way too expensive to do that.
- Now it’s been a few days I can’t remember why I was there, but I remember I was with Zach’s mom and possibly him and his dad too. We were in Florida, visiting my mom, who had moved there. It made me sad when I woke up because in my dream, I could tell my mom was still experiencing the grieving she’s still dealing with in real life.
- This one was a while ago, but my little sister Carolynn and I were running (literally running) away from policemen or secret agents or something. We were in DC (lol why?) and we were in an arts/ crafts store with these towering shelves with small drawers of yarn and strings. They were very precarious. The police found us here, so we had to weave in and out of these and escape. Then we were running again and we ran through a museum. Then we were running down this boardwalk-esque/pier thing with an indoor mall part that reminded me of Navy Pier, and we ducked inside. We just sat down at Subway and pretended to be customers, and watched the police continue running down the pier outside.
- I can’t describe this one too well, but I remember another dream where I was navigating a sort of ISOIAF world with different continents than this world’s. I was looking at a map. I was specifically considering a rather large circular, mountainous continent.